Adam Piggott writes:

Voluntarily Celibate

Bruce Charlton asked me about my views on celibacy in the context of the broader argument concerning MGTOW and its derivatives. I have already written about the dangers of jerking off and the sexual demons that accompany such mortal sins. But a discussion of celibacy itself I have not yet attempted. Thus the very first thing that I want to do is to define celibacy.

Celibacy is an abstention from all sexual acts, whether solitary or with someone else.

This is very important because many men claim to be celibate when in actual fact they are constantly playing with themselves like demented monkeys.

Bruce wrote the following in his question:

Celibacy may be a misfortune that needs to be borne with the best spirit that can be mustered, but it may be a particular man’s destiny to endure and learn-from (and sometimes this destiny will be divinely ordained).

And celibacy may be a positive Christian choice – as with the priesthood and religious orders.

In other words the whole idea of MGTOW is wrongly-framed and indeed spiritually destructive – because such discourse encourages the grave (and addictive) sin of resentment, rooted in the pernicious (and distinctively leftist) habit of regarding oneself as a victim.”

Bruce does not go far enough here. Celibacy absolutely must be viewed as a positive Christian choice because by doing as such we are embracing God’s path for us in a positive manner. This is critically important because it means that as a man you have individual power and autonomy over your actions and choices.

To illustrate this further, here is another comment from the same discussion by reader Joe:

Involuntary celibacy in a world drenched in porn and degeneracy is a living hell. It’s no wonder these men become resentful and go MGTOW. Although it would more accurately be called men going nowhere.”

Classifying something as involuntary directly infers that you have no power over your own circumstances. A powerless man is no man at all. Remember, the words that we use are critical. They have meaning and thus they convey power, or they take it away. Far from agonising over your celibate circumstances, you must embrace it, for that is what God desires for you in this time.

My wife left me over three years ago and since that time I have been celibate. My world is not “drenched in porn and degeneracy” because I simply don’t consume such demonic products. The first months were the hardest, but after that it got far easier to the point where now I barely register it. And believe me, I have been a womanising miscreant of major proportions in my life.

I don’t merely embrace my current celibacy, I take joy from it. Because for the very first time in my adult and teenage life I find myself in the position where I am not ruled by my passions. I am not engaging in these mortal sins and as such I am much clearer in my head. Do not be deceived; sin makes you stupid. If you want to begin to understand how and why our society is so stupid on so many levels, it is primarily because of the awful amounts of mortal sins which the average person performs on a daily basis.

If God sends a wife my way then I will be happy for that divine opportunity, which would be a real blessing considering my past behavior. But if not, then so be it. I cannot focus on this because what I must focus on is my relationship with God and His word. First I focus on Him above all else. By doing so my head becomes less cluttered and more clear; I am calmer and better able to make good decisions. I am not ruled by my emotions but rather by His will.

I am voluntarily celibate. I choose this path because I must remain bound within His law. Anything else is unacceptable to me. And I am able to do so with joy and with gladness at the many gifts that He has bestowed upon me. I do not feel bitterness at my circumstances nor loss at what might have been. I am blessed in so many different ways that demanding now that God provide me with a wife would be unseemly and greedy.

So take courage from these words and embrace the path that God has chosen for you, with grace and dignity and good humor. Do not overburden yourself with red pill rules while you jump through self-inflicted hoops to attract a mate or keep the one that you’re in danger of losing. Rather, get your own house in order. Focus on His rules and laws and how you can live them as a worthy servant of our Lord. If that means being celibate, really celibate, then so be it. If we are going to be worthy of Him then we need to be made of stern stuff.