Here is my commentary on Ephesians 5:32-33. I am publishing these once or twice a week, but you can read all of the available articles at our web-site, http://www.new-life.org.au

Ephesians 5:32-33

“This is a great mystery, and I am applying it to Christ and the church. Each of you, however, should love his wife as himself, and a wife should respect her husband.”

These verses serve a summary of what has gone before in terms of marital relationships and the mutual submission of husband and wife.

The unity between a man and a wife (“one flesh”) is a great mystery, Paul writes. A mystery is something hidden but now revealed. To understand the relationship of a husband and wife needs the illumination of Christ’s relationship with the Church.

These two things, the human marital relationship and the relationship of Christ to His Body, illuminate and explain each other . It is not surprising that the Church is described as the Bride of Christ (see for example Revelation 19).

Christ is the Head of His church and He exercises that by first dying for it. The headship of a husband with respect to his wife starts with the husband laying his life down, and only then can he exercise leadership in a loving relationship.

When we see the deep love and united vision of a husband and a wife, our eyes are opened to the unity that exists between Christ and the church.

This interplay between the two realities is shown by the way Paul freely changes from one to the other in this entire section.

So Paul concludes with the exhortation for each man to love his wife and for each wife to respect her husband.

Though Paul uses different words – love and respect- the illustration of Christ and the church shows that they are the same idea in practice.

Christ died for his church; but the church dies to Christ in order to be born again. Both husband and wife lay down everything for the other.

Paul again uses the word agape as the love that husbands should have for their wives. This is the love that God shows towards us, his people. It is the unfailing love that gives regardless of the worthiness of the recipient. Husbands must seek to love their wives with the agape love of God.

Wives are to respect their husbands. The word here is phobos . It literally means fear. This is not the terror kind of fear, but the kind of fear with which we are told we should fear God and those in authority over us. It is the respect that is given because of the status of the person.

In any event, to love a wife includes respect. Respect for a husband also involves loving them.

Key points in this verse:

• The unity of husband and wife reflect the love between Christ and His church
• Headship comes from a place of self sacrifice
• The love and respect which husbands and wives are exhorted to show overlap and become the same thing.

Here is my commentary on Ephesians 5:31. I am publishing these once or twice a week, but you can read all of the available articles at our web-site, http://www.new-life.org.au

Ephesians 5:31

“For this reason, a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two will become one flesh.”

At last Paul quotes the scripture, Genesis 2:24, that he has been considering all through this discussion about husbands and wives.

This single verse is the most profound sentence describing the reality of God’s plan for marriage in all of the Bible. It is so all-encompassing that Jesus did not need to add to it in his teaching.

Genesis 2:24 comes at the completion of the creation story. The woman was created from a rib taken out of Adam. It is “for this reason” that a man and a woman are joined and become one flesh. Adam and Eve were created as “ one flesh”, and marriage is in a sense a consummation of this origin.

For Christians and Jews alike, marriage is an existential institution. It goes to the heart of what it means to be human.

Marriage, then, is more than a social construct or a convenient way of binding people together for the purpose of rearing children. It is far more than a contract between equal adults and something that can be left at will.

This verse underlies the reluctance of the church to embrace divorce.”Therefore what God has joined together, let no one separate.” (Mark 10:9). If a man and a woman have been joined by God as one flesh, than any divorce is a judgement that God was wrong.

The same verse speaks against adultery and the plethora of sexual sins humans have imagined. To commit adultery is to sin against one’s own spouse and therefore one’s own flesh, as well as those of the other party. In Genesis 1, creation is described as separating things that should not be mixed, but adultery is seen as a destructive force that mixes together bonds and people that should not be mixed.

Marriage in the Scriptures is always about one man and one woman. Where polygamy is practised, it is seen as destructive because it runs against the “one flesh” narrative.

Similarly, same sex “marriage” is not just an abomination, but a contradiction. A man and a woman can become one flesh, but two men or two women cannot. Therefore, to call such a relationship a marriage runs against God’s intention.

To speak of a man and a woman as being “one flesh” is not linked only to the sexual relationship or even just to the wider sense of physical intimacy that couples enjoy. To be “ one flesh” means to share the same goals, vision, and mission in life. While they may have divergent interests and abilities, they will submit their life ambitions to the Lord and to one another, allowing the Holy Spirit to lead their joint enterprise. A husband and wife should see themselves as a team called into existence by God for a purpose that is greater than their individual purposes.

An example of this might be a nurse and engineer who see as a couple mission opportunities that complement and support one another. A wife with a strong prophetic ministry might empower a husband who is pastoral, and vice versa.

For a couple to be one flesh they must first leave their father and mother. While our relationships and obligations to parents remain after we marry, we must never allow allegiances to our parents get in the way of joining to our spouse. We must leave in order to cleave, to quote from an older translation of this verse.

Parents also must allow their children to leave, letting go of their emotional ties. There is no surer way to undermine a marriage then for parents to relentlessly intervene.

Key points in this verse:

• Marriage is an expression of the original creation of Adam and eve
• Divorce is a tearing apart of the single body formed in marriage
• Adultery and other sexual sins betray our own bodies as well as those of others
• Same sex “marriage” is a contradiction in terms
• Children must leave her parents in order to be joined to their spouse

Here is my commentary on Ephesians 5:29-30. I am publishing these once or twice a week, but you can read all of the available articles at our web-site, http://www.new-life.org.au

Ephesians 5:29-30

“For no one ever hates his own body, but he know where is it and tenderly cares for it, just as Christ cares for the church, because we are members of his body.”

Paul continues his instructions to husbands regarding their wives, and the analogy of Christ and the church.

No one ever hates his own body. It is in our self-interest to care for our body in the best way possible.

We nourish our body, doing what we can to make sure that we eat quality food and try to get the quantity right. In the ancient world, food security was not a known concept. There were periods of plenty, and periods drought or war made food scarce. Our problem is that there is always more than enough available to nourish the body which means that we have to choose the way of discipline.

We tenderly care for our bodies. When we are sick or injured, we seek out medical help. When we have pain we might change our work habits or the way we walk in order to minimise the pain. We tenderly care for our bodies because we know they are essential to our well-being.

Paul is saying that men need to treat their wives in the same way that they treat their own bodies. To love your wife is to love yourself (see v. 28), so therefore care for her with the same diligence that you care for your own body.

Just as a man takes a proactive attitude to his body (nourishing it) as well as a defensive or reactive approach (tenderly caring for it), a husband must both encourage or edify his wife, as well as protecting or reacting to threats of spiritual, emotional and physical well-being.

In this view of the marital relationship, all forms of domestic violence – coercion, physical abuse, emotional control, and financial deprivation – are prohibited. We don’t hate our own bodies, so how could a husband hate his wife? Domestic violence is not the topic here, but it is certainly within the scope of this “one flesh” analogy.

Paul now switches back to the relationship of Christ to the church. Christ loves his Body. He nurtures it and tenderly cares for it. We would not expect anything else from the one who came down and died to redeem the church. Having done that, He would, of course, continue to look after it.

So Christ nourishes the Body through the Word which is the Bread of Life. The Bible, when made freely available to the Body of Christ and preached faithfully by its pastors, provides all the requirements to sustain the life of the church.

The ministers of the church – the apostles, prophets, evangelists, pastors and teachers (Ephesians 4:1)- tenderly care for the body, providing protection from the attacks of the devil, as well as building up the weak and hurting parts of the Body.

All Christians are members of Christ’s body. Every believer has been Incorporated into this cosmic entity called the Church or the Body of Christ.

There is no such thing as an “ordinary” christian, any more than there is an “ordinary” husband or wife. We are all handcrafted masterpieces created for a purpose. Our membership of this Body affects our relationships, particularly marriage, and is not just for our heavenly destiny.

There are no “Lone Ranger” christians living apart from the Body, any more than there are legs or arms, eyes or noses, that live apart from a human body. We all belong to something much bigger than ourselves.

Key points in this verse:

• Husbands must care for their wives with as much diligence as they care for their own bodies
• We nourish and tenderly care for our bodies so therefore we must build up and protect our wives
• Christ cares for His Body in the same wayMinisters help to tenderly care for the body of Christ
• All Christians are members of Christ’s Body and cannot thrive apart from it

Here is my commentary on Ephesians 5:28. I am publishing these once or twice a week, but you can read all of the available articles at our web-site, http://www.new-life.org.au

Ephesians 5:28

“In the same way men should love their wives as they do their own bodies. He who loves his wife loves himself.”

Just as Christ loves the church and continues to make the church holy, so husbands must love their wives.

The word used for love here is not eros, the normal word for romantic love, but agape, the love that God has for his people. Christian husbands are not to love their wives because they are attracted to them physically, but because their wives are to be loved. Agape love gives for the sake of the beloved. It never gives up and does not keep a record of wrongs (1 Corinthians 13).

Marital love then is to mirror God’s love in being perfect and unchanging.

Just as we love our own bodies, husbands are to love their wives. We are usually acutely aware of the needs of our bodies, whether we are hungry, thirsty, hot or cold, distressed, or in pain. We unconsciously monitor the state of our bodies with our various senses. When something is awry we take remedial steps. We might even take preventive steps, for example putting on a coat before we get too cold.

Husbands should have the same awareness of the needs of their wives that we have for our own body. This includes not just the bodily needs, but also the emotional, social, and spiritual needs that she has.

This is not to suggest some kind of controlling policy where the husband micromanages every part of his wife’s life, being the sole provider of everything she might need.

Rather, this is a sensitivity to a wife’s needs in the same way that we are sensitive to our own needs.

The question that is at the heart of this instruction is, “How can I help my wife to flourish and become all that God wants her to be?”

In verse 31, Paul explicitly references Genesis 2:24. “For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and they will become one flesh.” But already in this verse this reference is hinted at in the expression that a man who loves his wife loves himself.

The “ one flesh” description of marriage is more than the shallow “happy wife happy life” mantra. It suggests that in marriage a spiritual union is made under the hand of God. This union means that marriage is more than a convenience or a legal institution.

Unity in marriage is such that when one partner flourishes so does the other. When one is struggling so is the other. The marriage bond is more than two individuals coming together. It is a new creation.

Key points in this verse:

• husbands are to love their wives in the same way Christ loves the church
• husbands must love their wives with the self-giving agape love of god
• husbands should concern themselves above all with their wife’s physical, spiritual and emotional well-being

Here is my commentary on Ephesians 5:27. I am publishing these once or twice a week, but you can read all of the available articles at our web-site, http://www.new-life.org.au

Ephesians 5:27

“… so as to present the church to himself in splendour, without a spot or wrinkle or anything of the kind – yes so that she might be holy and without blemish.”

In the previous verses, we read that Christ loved the church and gave himself up for her, in order to make her holy. Now the ultimate purpose of this is so that He can present the church to Himself in splendour, without spot or wrinkle, holy and without blemish .

Paul has a high view of the church, as can be seen right throughout the letter to the Ephesians. For Paul, the church is not a human institution or a Sunday morning club. No, it is something of cosmic significance, the Bride that the Son of God died to redeem.

So the cross is not just about setting individual sinners free from Hell. That is important, but it is not just that.

When Jesus died, he had in view a church, a race of people that transcends every human division of race, sex or economic class. This is something new that has never been seen in all of creation. A people who are cleansed from every sin and now stand perfectly re-created in holiness and perfection.

Christ will present the church to himself. It seems an odd expression as we usually think of someone or something being presented to someone else. Jesus gave his life for the church, and so He can rightly presented to himself. It is His possession, His trophy, His property.

The church is presented to Christ in Splendour. In Greek the word used here derives from “doxa” the word usually translated as “glory”. The church is presented in glory, not her own glory but the glory of God.

Like a bride cleaned up, wearing makeup, wearing the finest of clothes, and looking radiant, so the church is presented to Christ as “splendid.”

We are all too aware of the failings of various expressions of church. Pastors fail, sometimes in terrible and abusive ways. People can be hypocritical and self-righteous. Church can be a cover for child abuse.

But all of that will pass away. The church in its divine calling is something glorious. We might see the grime and dirt, but God sees the hidden splendour.

The church will be without a spot or wrinkle. Not even the smallest of imperfections distract from the true beauty of the church. All of the things that make us despair, the hurtful and criminal things, will be taken away, and the church will be perfect in appearance and in nature. We can be sure of that because of the holiness of God.

We are called to be holy as he is holy. We are set apart for God’s purposes. This calling to holiness will be realised. At the moment, in this life, we are being fashioned into holiness. we are being moulded, crafted, purposed to take a particular position in the church, in the temple which God is creating (Ephesians 2:21-22)

Our destiny is that the church will ultimately be without blemish. This means that every christian, every member of the church, will be without blemish. In this age we struggle with many temptations and fall prey to many sins, but in the age to come, every one of us will be without sin. The things that attract us will no longer seem desirable. We will truly be holy and without blemish.

Key points in this verse:

• Christ has a goal for the church to be splendid comma without any imperfection.
• Salvation is about more than individuals, but a whole body, a bride for Christ
• All of the messy imperfections in the church and in every christian will be completely washed away

Here is my commentary on Ephesians 5:26. I am publishing these once or twice a week, but you can read all of the available articles at our web-site, http://www.new-life.org.au

Ephesians 5:26

“… that he might sanctify her, having cleansed her by the washing of water with the word.”

This verse continues the thought of the previous verse, that Christ gave himself up for the church, in order to sanctify her.

Christ is sanctifying the church, that is making it holy. The church is the ekklesia, that is the assembly of people “called out” by God. It is the elect, the chosen ones.

In that since, the church is already holy or set apart for God. This is why Paul describes it is a temple earlier in the letter .

But in another sense, the church is in a process of being sanctified. Each christian must undergo a life long process of being refined and made fit for heaven. This process only concludes when we are promoted to glory and see God for who He really is.

To be sanctified means to be cleansed of every thought and action that springs from the sinful heart of human beings. It is dying to our old nature and rising to new life in Christ.

There is a two-step process in view here.

First, He cleanses us. When we come to Christ the record of the past is wiped clean. The old is gone and the new is here. The list of all our prior sins is deleted so that every barrier between our sinful nature and the holy God is demolished.

Our soul was disfigured by the marks of our sins. Jesus remove these marks and cleanses us.

Having been cleansed, He sanctifies us. This is the ongoing process of becoming more like Christ in every part of our lives – individually and corporately as the church.

We are cleansed for a purpose. We are forgiven with a destination in mind. Some people think that cleansing is the end in itself. Their lives are a repeated cycle of temptation, sin, confession, forgiveness. They repeat the same sins endlessly because they fail to see that the goal is not forgiveness but holiness.

The Lord does not want us to just be cleansed today but to stay clean in a life dedicated to God’s purposes .

Paul mentions two instruments of cleansing and sanctification.

The first is water, that is baptism. Baptism marks a transition from sinner to saint. It is a public declaration that a person is dedicating themselves to following Christ .

Baptism does not carry sanctifying grace in itself. There is nothing in the external element of water that carries particular grace. However, when combined with the faith of the believer and of the gathered saints, it becomes the instrument of cleansing. The Holy Spirit becomes powerfully present in the act through the faith of the church.

The second instrument mentioned here is the word. The word is the word of scripture read, proclaimed and expounded by the church.

When we first come to Christ, the promise of forgiveness contained in the Bible is what brings our spirit to life. The Bible becomes a living word which points us to salvation .

As we mature in faith, the scriptures serve to convict us of sin and point to a higher way. As we seek to follow Christ more accurately, the Holy Spirit gives us grace to do so.

We might ask how this applies to husbands. Without pressing the analogy too far, there is a sense in which the faith of a man or woman can help to draw their spouse to a deeper relationship with God.

A husband is not Christ to his wife. However, his faithfulness to Christ, his example of submitting his life to the Lord, his surrender to God’s purposes, and his tender love for his wife, all help to illustrate for her what it means to be cleansed and sanctified. Of course this is a two-way street in which both partners encourage each other to holiness.

Key points in this verse:

• We are cleansed in order to be sanctified, forgiven to become holy
• The Holy Spirit uses the water of baptism and the reading of the word to make us holy
• Husbands are to help their wives become holy to the Lord